正在看《烈火战车》。有了很多感触。我像阿祖的“幼稚”，而你像她的关心和执着。你看了，可能会有跟我一样的感觉吧。

执着.

跟阿妈一起看台湾长剧，有新的体会。人生无常，何必那执着呢？嗨。


so now i cannot mention anything about anyone who had a past with me? why pile so much emotional baggage on yourself? So from now on, I dont speak to any other girl who is interested in me, that will make you much happier? sigh. You really need me to be like that? 

So today, I managed to ruin your day? sigh. I dont blame your friend. She is just saying. I have nothing to hide. I am just really tired of all these. A perfectly fine day and "Hey, she say she saw you in town. Saw you 约会。" and there ends the beautiful day. sigh. buy 4D/Lottery also not so 准。Have not seen her for months and first lunch and this happened. Argh! so irritated. sigh.


郎有情，女有意。我们到底在做什么？

I would really wish i know what you are thinking about. What are you unhappy about? sigh.  why so literal? 

很烦。不知道你在想什么。我又做错了什么？你到底在不开心什么？嗨。

heard this from Robin during the wedding:
"Knowing you is fate. Being your friend is my choice. Falling in love with you is beyond my control." oh my... so sweet. wonder when will is be in his shoes, on the podium. 

这一年的时差

昨天晚上，当我看到落泪的你，我有了一股好想拥抱你的冲动。好想的紧紧的抱着你。嗨。我应该吗？我还是一样。 在表达这方面就是不知所措。你说能唱的出好听的情歌的歌手，都是有故事的。我不是秘密练歌，是听了有上千次同样的歌，看了上百次的MV，有了小小的体会，可以说一些领悟吧。我们都还是一样，可是又不一样。听我唱时，希望你有觉得我在这一年的时差，对感情的感触和体会。

我不知道如何前进。嗨。

跟你在一起的时候，真的很开心。不管是说话或传text都打从心里笑出来。到了现在都会有心跳加速的感觉。

重来

i know she knows the pros and cons of the job. there are always people who try for two years and are back to normal lives. like i said, the job is not hard. and the hard times will pass. one will never be junior forever. hmm. roster is difficult as one will live month by month. but off days are more than most and time can be made after a bit.

One thing is for sure. confirm couple code. :) hmm. but i can wish long long. sigh. 真的可以重来吗？

小朋友，我可以重新认识你吗？

Argghhhh!

I did something damm stupid. I send her 2 postcards in NYC. slot a stack into US Mail Office, and I forgot to fill in her address... And I only realise this on the way back from Frankfurt to singapore... Arghhhhhhh! :( idiot. Finally got the courage to write and screwed up. Arghhh! I want to scream...!!!! 

i called her. amazing. i did not know what happened. my heart was pounding. but could not meet up. guess it was too... abrupt? hmm... anyway. everything seems like a blur. till now. need to calm down. 

刚才有了一股冲动，要打给她。可是又不知道从那里说起。

我每次都知道要的是什么，要去哪里，要做什么。可是唯有你让我不知所措。我真的忘不了你。今天起飞和降落的感觉特别的承重。后天我要去纽约了。又要再一次走了， 小朋友。

Had good talks with a couple of peeps. With Si Jie. with Daniel. with some crew. hmm. just back from a flight. very tired. did not really sleep last night, or rather this morning.

Just came back from MEL a couple of days ago. had a long awaited catch up with Linggie. talk so much. took so many photos. been like what? 3 years since i saw her? missing her already.

received gifts from her. and a post card. it was damaged. surprised it even reached me. hmm. you know what. by touching the wrapping, i knew what it was. and the other i knew what she would had wrote. haas.
hmm. really happy for her that she went on this trip. i feel this period of one year made me grew so much. this whole year made me stronger in my convictions. and i know now that, if i am ever together with her again, i will never let her go.
it is not not worth the fight. just not yet, then. but are things so simple, now?

want to share a picture. hope it will make some people's day.

Baby Chloe

today Febella ask me about her. said she misses her. ask me to tell her. sigh. how?
questions keep coming.
where is jiejie?
on a plane. somewhere.
can you call her? now?
no.
why? computer can right?
ya...
call her now.  sigh. haas.

嗨。今天真的知道什么是，无言以对。只可以苦笑的面对。每次都被ah ma说。嗨。

梁伟健。要到几时才会成熟一点？真的要错过吗？一错再错。
可是真的有的回头吗？又犯错的时候，怎么办？她又会受伤，又伤心。我不想看到她伤心。真的。

看完九把刀的故事了。我不喜欢那个结局。可是那是他的故事。现实就是这样。
那我们的故事呢？要什么种的结局？嗨。太晚了吧。

怕

那時我們　為何走到分岔

以前的我怕失去自己而离开你。现在又是什么样子呢？

今天一直想到那句诗，"众里寻他千百度蓦然回首那人却在灯火阑删处。"
真窍。嗨。昨晚刚刚提起，今早就看到面薄的一个上载。 想了想，左思右想，还是不知道从何下笔。嗨。 因为那时的没有勇气，现在有了千里之外的感受。

在新加坡就是看不到那满天悲伤的星火。
你在世界的另一端看的到吗？  

发觉人生不是一个人的。
讲真的，现在那有怎么样？ 错过了多少的风景。

＂也许在另一个平行时空，我们是在一起的。＂

辛弃疾

东风夜放花千树，更吹落、星如雨。宝马雕车香满路。风箫声动，玉壶光转，一夜鱼龙舞。蛾儿雪柳黄金缕，笑语盈盈暗香去。众里寻他千百度；蓦然回首，那人却在灯火阑珊处。

a book

one day i was wondering about a classic question, "if your house caught fire and you can only save one book, which one would you save?" I always do not know the answer. Logical question to think about, i have so many books. the question was never answered. and it went away.

some days back, i was packing my room. saw it. the second i saw it, the question popped. "This is the book that i would save." haas. so silly. do not know why i have this thought. and do not know if it is the same for you.

i really dont know what to say. thought about it. how? sigh... 当时说不出，到了现在还是无言以对。

梁伟健。真的要弄到一个无言的结局吗？嗨。

taiji was good. today learn another half a step. haha. tomorrow going to practice on my own. need to get some loose pants for it. and maybe a new shoes. need to print out the announcement texts too. need to do up the book these couple of days.

good nights.

Postcard

first thing when I came back from teh with Happy and Sufiyan, i saw something that made my world stood still for a bit. hmm... mixed feelings. smiling yet sad. a lot to say but nothing is coming out. if you are the one receiving what would you be feeling? haas.

the friend told me i should give you the tickets now already. but is it really so simple?

had a talk with dad. realised i have not been really talking to him. he is really a very good dad. every time, everyone in the family seems to be screaming at him or grumbling about something. but after i think about it, actually he is really very... 耐骂. and he is a very simple man. really appreciate him. hope daniel understands this too. sigh.

anyway, dad did not say a lot. but in his own way, he is telling me to think about what i need to do. haas.

recently keep listening to A-Lin's album. all the songs seems to be trying to say something, i just too dumb to understand. just want share this song.

really very happy you wrote me a postcard. looking at the date, it seems that you took some time to send it out. a postcard of the tower from barcelona? haas. so cute. thanks. you should look at my postcards. of course i did not send to you. how to? sigh.

hmm... hope you are alright. drink more water. do not need to rest more. already not enough time to enjoy and experience. so just drink more water. :)

九把刀的故事越来越精彩了。

good nights. taiji session later. :)

As i am going through my photos, one thought came across my mind. my photos are too dark. something that you always say. haha. I do not know why i thought of that, guess my photos are a tad too dark.

something that i missed out in my previous post, i met my primary school friend in Perth. in my uncle's house. during the house party. oh my... how can the world be so small. and again, an image of you having the incredulous look on your face and saying, "来了咯，你真的很多朋友leh..."
haha! oh well...

Today i had my first tai ji session. it is really not as easy as most people think. it is actually very difficult. a lot of balance. a lot of muscle usage. especially the waist and legs. going to keep practicing it. Wednesday going for it again. wink.

Tomorrow is an important day in history. gaming history at least. haha! Release of Diablo III! cannot wait! need to get my fingers warmed up for the clicking! :)

good night singapore. and to you. where ever you are. :) and i wonder which is your favorite city. maybe it is the same as mine? haas... oh wells...

Perth with Family 2012

First of all, HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY to all! share a photo with you all! haha!

my Ah Ma!

Just back from Perth. Very tiring YET very fulfilling trip! Took quite a bit of photos. First day was just touch down and lunch, visit to King's Park, followed by supermarket. (so crew-like, haha!) Because we need to prepare some food to bring to a couple of temples for prayers.

View from King's Park

Ah Ma enjoying some alone time

                                                                           

Second day was visit to the temples. quite a bit of distance even by driving. but the scenery was breath-taking! :) The second temple is still under construction, will be done by next year.



Third day was the farm stay day! Hmm.. The weather was still not very good. on and off drizzling. after a long drive, we are at Harvey. To start things of, picnic at Harvey Dam. It was Ah Ma's first time eating Subway. She like it! The farm was kind of commercial and chalet like. small area and the housings was close to the office. The night was very chilly but the stars was beautiful... sigh.
The next morning we went to feed the animals. just the rabbits, chickens, ducks, sheep and horses. There was this very animal-shy sheep named Lily. She will stay away from the rest of the animals but keep following us around. So funny!

Sunset

Lily!

On the fourth day, we head to Mandurah and have a look at all the houses. It is a port town. There are a lot of beautiful houses that have boats and yachts parking just at their backyard, a dock/pier for their leisure. Quite a nice place. To own something like that in Singapore will cause something like 20 million? It is just about a million or two at Mandurah.

And of course! Ah Ma missed the two little ones so much that she wants to Skype them. So we all gathered in front of the computer and do a little "get-together".

Janssia and Febella

 Fifth day and off to Freemantle! The weather was fantastic! First day that went without any sign of rain! The sky is like a blue canvas and clouds are like candy floss! Went to visit the tourist souvenir shops and lunch at Cicerello's Fish and Chips. Honestly, I think the chips are just ok. not fantastic. luckily I had the Boston Chilli Mussels. Not wow. just alright. haha! Went to a couple of beaches. very nice weather very nice beaches. Off to visit Auntie Lisa's house.

Saturday, which was our last free day was another visit to the supermarket! Because we had a house warming party! :) Ah Ma was master chef and we all helped! Yes. Me included. haha! Everyone came with their pot luck items, food platter, cakes, roast meat, roast duck, chicken wings etc. I learned a lot about cooking too! Yays! so happy! :)

Sunday was an early day and off we go to the airport to be back into Singapore. Hope we can do this again! and soon! :)

Ah Kim's Mum! 

First row: Ah Kim's Mum, Ah Ma, Ah Gong and Da Gu Gong.
Standing: Daniel, Ah Kim, Small Gu, Pa, Mummy, Kim Po, San Gu Gong and mE!

not a lot of instax. love to have more!

缘分 and a very good person

Today Ah Ma was telling me a story. There was a colleague of hers whose best friend got married with her boyfriend. She did not get married. Stay single for 20 over years. The guy got divorced when his son was 9 years old. When his son was 19 years old, the two met again. At a temple. By that time, the guy is already 50. And the lady, 40 plus years old. Her prime time of her life was over. The two of time got married.  One big round and all together again. 真的会有缘吗？ Today something happened. All of us were in the honey shop. A local family walked in and there was this very beautiful baby girl named Grace. She was very shy. Everyone tried to carry her but she turned away. When Ah Ma tried, she put out her hands! The whole time Grace was in Ah Ma's hands. When it was time to say goodbye, Grace waved good bye to her parents and family. It was so surprising as she is supposed to be a very shy girl.  When I left the shop, the owner told me, it must be been that Grace like Ah Ma's heartbeat. She must be a very good person.  At that moment, my heart was filled with pride and love and I could not agree with him more.